Church Sermon - May 14, 2006

LOVE WITH ACTION AND IN TRUTH!

Rev. Mark F. Bartels

Historical Lesson; Acts 8:26-40
Epistle Lesson; 1 John 3:18-24
Gospel Lesson; John 15:1-8
Sermon Text; 1 John 3:18-24

I want to tell you a story that I think epitomizes Mother’s Day. It is the most powerful story I could find. But, it is also one of the most gruesome stories. However, because it is in scripture, I feel at liberty to tell it to you. In fact, let me just read it to you, right out of the Bible.

Two women came to the king and stood before the king. One of them said, "My lord, this woman and I live in the same house. I had a baby, while she was with me. The third day after my child was born, this woman also had a baby. We were alone; there was no one in the house but the two of us.

During the night, this woman’s son died, because she lay on him. So, she got up in the middle of the night, and took my son from my side, while I, your servant, was asleep. She put him by her breast, and put her dead son by my breast. The next morning, I got up to nurse my son - and he was dead! But when I looked at him closely in the morning light, I saw that it was not the son I had borne."

The other woman said, "No! The living one is my son; the dead one is yours."

But the first one insisted, "No! The dead one is yours; the living one is mine." And so they argued before the king.

The king said, "This one says, ‘My son is alive and your son is dead,’ while that one says, ‘No! Your son is dead and mine is alive.’

Then the king said, "Bring me a sword." So they brought a sword for the king. He then gave an order: "Cut the living child in two. Give half to one and half to the other."

The woman whose son was alive was filled with compassion for her son and said to the king, "Please my lord, give her the living baby. Don’t kill him!"

But the other said, "Neither I nor you shall have him. Cut him in two!"

Then the king gave his ruling: "Give the living baby to the first woman. Do not kill him; she is his mother."

How did King Solomon know who the mother of that child was? It was because that woman was willing to make a choice that put the best interest of that child ahead of her own. And since it was in the best interest of the child to stay alive, she put those best interests ahead of her own. She was willing to sacrifice whatever it took to keep that child alive. And, if it meant giving him up and someone else raising him as her son, she was willing to do that.

The other woman was not willing to make that choice, to put that child’s best interest ahead of her own and sacrifice whatever it took to meet that child’s needs. And with that, King Solomon knew. That is mother-like love, to make a choice to put the best interest of that child ahead of her own, and sacrifice whatever it takes to meet that child’s need.

Today is Mother’s Day. We could not find a more appropriate day to talk about love, in the context of the family, than today, particularly given the scripture reading that happens to fall on today’s date. The first verse of that scripture reading (which also is the Epistle Lesson for today) says,

"Dear children, dear children,

let us not love with words or tongue,

but with action and in truth."

I will tell you as a pastor, I encounter many families who are in crisis. They are in crisis between husband and wife, or parent and child, or child and child. If there is one thing that I wish every family would leave here today with, it is what I call a working definition of the word love.

What does love mean? We look at each other in our families and we say, "I love you." A husband tells his wife, "I love you." A child tells his parents, "I love you." But, what if I were to ask you to stand up, right now, in front of the whole congregation and define what you mean, when you say to your family members, "I love you?" Love is a very difficult word to define. Very difficult. And I think many families do not have a working definition for love, when they say, "I love you."

If nothing else, I hope when you leave here today, you walk out, as a family, with this working definition of the word love.

a choice to put the other person’s

best interest

so important

that you will sacrifice whatever it takes

to meet their needs.

Why do I give that definition of love? If you look in the Bible, just two verses before the verse we are looking at today, just two verses earlier the Bible gives an awesome definition of the word love. In fact, it starts out this way. It says, "This is how we know what love is." (So there the Bible is telling you, "I am going to lay out the definition. This is how we know what love is." Here comes the definition. And, you won’t understand this definition, unless you are a Christian.)

"Jesus Christ laid down His life for us."

Period. That is the Bible’s definition of love. Now, as a Christian, when you look at that definition you know what it means. You know that if Jesus were to look at you, and ask, "Is there any reason in you, why I should love you?"

The answer to that is, "Absolutely not. It is not because of my looks. It is not because of the car I drive, or the house I own, or how many jokes I can tell."

That really means nothing to our Savior. In fact, what our Savior demands of us is that we follow His Will in our lives. As we look at our own selves and our own lives, we have to say, "How many times in my life, day after day, after day, hour after hour, after hour, here stands my Savior, and I sin against Him over, and over, and over."

Christ could look at us and say, "There is no reason, no reason in you why I should love you. You should be condemned for all eternity, because of the way you treat me."

And yet, our Savior, our Savior, in profound love, has made the choice, the decision to love us. What does that mean? It means that He has looked at what is in our best interest. And what is in our best interest? As He looks at us, He sees that left to ourselves we are headed headlong to Hell. And there is nothing we can do to stop it. We can’t undo our sin. We can’t earn God’s favor. We can’t work our way into His favor. We can’t do any of that. We are bound for Hell, and cannot do anything to save ourselves.

So finally, our Savior says, "I love you." Our Savior knows that it is in our best interest, it is in our best interest that we do not go to Hell. And so, our Savior made a choice to put our best interest so important that He was willing to sacrifice whatever it took to meet our best interest.

And, what did our Savior do for us? Our Savior so loved us that He looked at us and He said,

That is what our Savior did for us. That is love. The Bible says,

"This is how we know what love is.

Jesus Christ laid down His life for us."

He made the choice to put our best interest so important that He sacrificed whatever it took, to meet those best interests.

That definition goes on and says this:

"This is how we know what love is.

Jesus Christ laid down His life for us.

And we ought to lay down our lives for each other."

There the Bible tells us, as Christians, we are to have Christ-like love. It means that we are to be willing, in our lives, to make that choice, to put the best interest of our family members so important that we will sacrifice whatever it takes, even our lives, to meet those best interests. And so, our scripture reading for today tells us how to put that into practice. It says,

"Dear Children,

let us not love with words or tongue,

but with actions and in truth."

Today, Mom is going to get a Mother’s Day card. But you know what? It is just words. It is just words. And today, Mom is going to hear, "I love you." But, that is only with the tongue. And that is fine, but scripture tells us not to just love that way. It says,

"Let us not love with words or tongue,

but with actions and in truth."

That means in our home we want to put love into action. We make the choice, by God’s help, through Jesus Christ our Savior, to put our family members’ best interest so important that we will sacrifice whatever it takes to meet their needs and their best interest.

The world does not see love that way. The world sees love as an emotion. It is an emotion of mushy, gushy feelings. "I feel really good being around you. I feel mushy, gushy being around you." But, the problem with emotions is that emotions come and go. And so the world teaches that we can fall in and out of love, because we may not feel mushy, gushy around you anymore.

Scripture teaches that love is far, far deeper than an emotion. It is a decision, by the power of the Holy Spirit, in Jesus Christ. It is a decision, even if I don’t feel mushy, gussy around you right now, even if I don’t enjoy being around you right now, even if you are unlovable, with all kinds of problems with how you treat me, it is a decision to say, "By the help of God, I will put your best interests so important in this family that I will sacrifice whatever it takes to meet those best interests."

I like how Martin Luther described that kind of love. Listen to what he says, and how he refers to the love of a mother. "Christian love does not let itself be embittered, does not cease to love, does not cease to do good, and does not cease to put up with evil. In short, love cannot hate or be hostile to anyone. No one can commit greater evils than love can bear. No one can commit more sins against it, than love can cover. It cannot not be so highly enraged that it refuses to forgive.

It acts like a mother does, toward a child who is sickly, foul, and filthy. She has no eyes for these defects, even though she sees them. Love makes her blind. In fact, the eyes with which she looks upon her child, as a beautiful fruit of her body, given by God, are so pure that she is unmindful of all the imperfections and considers them as nothing. She even excuses and adorns them. If the child is far sighted, it must not be said to squint, but to wink cutely with its eyes. Even a wart must be considered very becoming."

There, Luther describes what we call unconditional love. There are no strings attached. I don’t love you, if you are cute. I don’t love you, if you are good looking. I don’t love you, if you are fun to be around. I love you. I love you. I make the choice, with God’s help, to put your best interests so important that I will sacrifice whatever it takes to meet those needs.

Best interests-we are not talking about what the people in your family want, because our wants may not be in our best interests. We are talking about what is in the best interest of my mom, my dad, my brother, my sister, my spouse, my child. What is in their best interest? And how do we know what is in the best interest of our family members? We go to scripture. Scripture tells us what is in their best interest. What is the number one best interest of anybody in your family? Number one, number one is that they get to Heaven. There is nothing more important than that. Everything else in life is going to pass away, but the soul lasts forever. That means in our home, we will make the choice to put the spiritual best interest of our family so important that we will sacrifice whatever it takes to meet that need.

Let me give you an example. (This almost made me cry out loud, here in church, a couple of years ago.) There was a mom who sent her child to our school. The mom did not go to church, had no interest in going to church, and did not want to go to church. But, she did send her little boy to our school. And, at our school, this little boy became a little Christian. And, he became a very firm, little, believer in Jesus, as his only Savior from sin. The Holy Spirit worked in him. He loved the Word of God, and wanted to go to church. But, his mom did not want to come to church.

The only time they would come to church, was when the school kids had to sing in the church service. A couple of times I watched, as this little boy would sing. After they sang, (which was before the sermon), he would walk down the isle, and the mom would stand up, grab his hand, walk out of the church, and they would be gone. So, they never got to hear the Word of God. Then one day, after the children sang, and the little boy walked down the isle, the mom stood up to take him out of church. I watched, sitting in my chair, as that little boy who was walking out of church, gave his mom a tug. Then, he pulled her a little more, and went and sat down in a pew. I saw the mom look at him, thinking, "I can’t cause a commotion, here in church." So, she sat down. And, that day she heard the Word of God!

Now, there is a little boy who made a choice. He put his mom’s best interest (and it was in her best interest to hear the Word of God), so important that he was willing to sacrifice whatever it took to meet those needs. I don’t know what kind of sacrifice he made; however, he may have gotten in trouble for that, when he got home. That is love.

One of my favorite hymn verses is the third verse from the hymn we sang before the sermon,

(That means the parents who make the choice, give heed to their children’s foremost need. And what is our children’s foremost need? It is to know Christ, to be in Christ.)

What a blessing it is in a home, when mom and dad are willing to sacrifice whatever it takes to see to it that their children have Jesus, and have the Word of God in their lives!

And, love is a sacrifice. In Lithuanian, the word for mother is a very interesting word. It is the word martyr. Think about that - the word for mother is martyr. And, a martyr is someone who is sacrificed. Love, Christian love, involves sacrifice. Sacrifice is the epitome of Christian love.

Love is not easy. It involves sacrifice.

In our homes, in our Christian homes, when we really understand love, that it is a choice to put the best interest of my family members so important that I will sacrifice whatever it takes to meet their needs, it is not easy.

But, if we could all have Christian love in the family, if we could all do that, if we could make that choice, to put our family member’s best interest so important that we would sacrifice whatever it took to meet those needs, what harmony we would have in our homes!

So, why is it, knowing all that, why is it, in our homes, that spouses berate one another? Why is it, in our homes, that parents harshly and unduly criticize their children and hurt them? Why is it, in our homes, that children are disrespectfully disobedient to their parents? Why is it, in our homes, that there are unwanted children? Why is it, in our homes, that there are teenagers so hungry for love that they will go to the wrong places to get it? Why is it that there are people living in nursing homes who have broken hearts, because no one comes to see them?

I will tell you why. It is because we don’t do this. We don’t make the choice to put the best interest of our family members so important that we sacrifice whatever it takes to meet their needs. That is sin.

Thank God our scripture reading goes on and says,

"This is how we set our hearts at rest

whenever our hearts condemn us.

God is greater than our hearts."

We all stand condemned. None of us here is a perfect family member. We have all sinned against our family members. We have all been selfish and self-centered. But, thank God, in repentance, we can go right to our Savior, and He is greater than our hearts. We run right back to His love. We run right back to the Word, where He tells us that He has made that choice, to put our best interest so important that He has died for our sins. And, He forgives them freely, every day. And by that, our faith is strengthened. We are motivated to go out and live for our Savior.

I don’t know, I don’t know what kind of sacrifices my mom made for me. I am sure I can never begin to estimate them. I know she could have had a teaching career, but she didn’t. I know if my parents would have had two jobs, they could have had nicer houses, and nicer cars. And, I know that if they would have had two jobs, that my dad, still at age 77, would not have to still be working, as he is now. I know my parents made a lot sacrifices for me. And, I am sure yours did for you, too.

Let’s all walk out of here today, committed to saying,

"Dear children,

let us not love in words or with tongue,

but in action and in truth."

And, let us have that scriptural working definition of love. Love is a choice to put the best interests of my family members so important that I will sacrifice whatever it takes, with the help of God, to meet those needs.

Amen.

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